On Growing Older and Running Out of Pages… (Finding the Time to Read)

Okay, this is going to be a long one. And I’m going to put this on my Medium and my Substack. How many of you remember that episode of The Twilight Zone with Burgess Meredith. It’s a famous episode. You know the one: “Time Enough At Last.” Such an iconic story. So this essay is mostly about finding the time to read when we get older. A lot of us don’t have that luxury, so think of this as a kind of exercise. Maybe we can do this challenge together, and it can become routine.

People often ask me what writing part-time is like; I used to do it full time in the 2000s. Depending on what kind of writer you are, you’re basically putting your thoughts into words and getting them down on paper. You’re living out a fictional scene in your head and trying to put that scene into words, along with the world around it. You’re doing a lot of typing, a lot of line editing, a lot of reading. Then you return a week, maybe two weeks later, to revisit what you wrote and do some more polishing. Improve what you started, improve your craft, experiment with things like structure and style. Even when you’re not writing, you’re reading.

If it’s not gate-kept, writing is a numbers game where you’re constantly creating content, trying to make it into some bigger editor’s second or third reading tier. And you do this because you have to; you don’t really see yourself not doing it. At the same time you’re investing in your portfolio—fiction or non-fiction—and trying to get a paycheck from it if you’re lucky. It could be a short story, a novel, an article, even greeting-card jingles or nonsensical filler that, surprisingly, sells. If you’re like me, you might be banging out anywhere from 40 to 65 pieces per year.

Now a voice in the back row just said, “Hey, that’s great, Larry. You write a lot of stories, produce a lot of content. You’re in so many anthologies and magazines. You submit to so many places. But how do you read all these books? How do you find the time?”

Honestly, as you get older, you don’t. I’m looking at a giant pile of books behind me as I write this. It’s a mess here. I’m old now, and I’ll never get to all of it. I know that. And the trouble is, every time I’m in Manhattan, I keep picking up books and never getting to them. Obviously, short stories and novellas are more approachable than full-length novels these days. For me, at least.

Between 1985 and 2005, I read voraciously. Sometimes two to three paperbacks per week. Before my son was born, I had bookcases upon bookcases of pulp paperbacks, old Galaxy and Analog magazines, Hard Case-style crime thrillers in the vein of James Bond, Charles L. Grant anthologies, Stephen King novels, DAW “Best Of” collections. I had a collection of 2000 books. These were mixed in with the essential satires and mainstream dramatizations of the 1960s, 70s, and 80s—Kurt Vonnegut, Joseph Heller, Mario Puzo, Ira Levin, etc—the three most important decades of literature. But then you realize you have to change diapers, make formula, sing lullabies, rock carriages, go to playgrounds and push swings. Cook meals, send kids off to school, exhausted. And you have to co-parent until that kid turns eighteen and goes off to college.

You can’t get to all those books. Maybe at night in bed, or on a commute, or on the toilet doing business (don’t laugh), you get a lengthy chapter in. Then, when they go off to higher learning and hang out with their friends, you return to what you started. But there’s still never any time. It’s always that way. So I ended up donating the vast majority of those 2000 books, throwing a few away, giving some to libraries, and selling lots on eBay.

And what if you work demanding ten-hour days in the middle of nowhere, where you have to hop on the turnpike, beat the traffic rush, and drive home? What if you want to go out, have a drink, go dancing, go to a nice restaurant, socialize? What if you have other hobbies?

For example, one of my hobbies is console gaming. PlayStation, Nintendo, and the like. I have 700 physical video games sitting on my shelves. Yes, 700 games with replay value—or still sealed. You might have more than one hobby. Some people have a few. Like gaming, I also collect action figures and cars. I’m part of a few diecast communities these days. But you have to go to stores and hunt those things down.

A year ago, I bought an iPad with my royalty money. One of those nice ones with a lot of memory. The purpose was to read books and review PDFs wherever I went. On the go. You know, other than downloading a few Apple songs, I haven’t even really used that iPad yet. I recharge it every few months so the battery doesn’t run down and bloat.

I used to watch television. For years I was a die-hard Walking Dead and LOST fan. I watched those two shows religiously, while devoting extra time to British imports like Doctor Who and Torchwood. I got rid of the Disney Channel, got rid of TV. I don’t watch television anymore. The Walking Dead ended after 11 seasons, I gave Ncuti Gatwa (the 15th Doctor) two years of my time, and I felt that was the end of my TV days. As for movies, I go to the theaters twice per year. Superhero films don’t interest me like they used to, and IMAX doesn’t really have anything either. I’m fatigued by the fandom surrounding modern cinema. And there’s just no time; although I am looking forward to the Super Mario Galaxy movie.

Also, as you get older you get less sleep and you’re prone to afternoon naps. There’s the grocery shopping, the laundry, the quick cleaning of the kitchen countertops and bathroom. As you age, you forget stuff. Your brain shrinks. Your eyesight goes on you, and you have to read passages more than once to comprehend them. And you have to take care of your body—gym, yoga, outdoor fitness—because you’re aging and your body can break down. More time away from books.

Then there’s social media—talk about time-consuming—a rabbit hole that can steal your life away. These days I use one or two pieces of social media. I have a TikTok. I don’t even use it. I use BlueSky. And you know what? With only one or two platforms, I get more work read and more exposure publicly. When I had ten pieces of social media back in the 20-teens, I was read and noticed less. Sometimes less is more.

After everything you’ve just read comes the fact that you have to be a picky reader. There are over one billion books worldwide. Think about that number. There are over one billion authors—dead authors, living authors, traditionally published authors, small press authors, children’s authors, fiction writers, non-fiction writers, textbook writers, anthology writers, self-help writers, self-published writers. There’s new books, used books, ebooks, audiobooks, web novels. You will never get to all the books you want to read, no matter how hard you try. You have no choice but to pick and choose, and you have to do it wisely.

So I decided to sit down this winter and choose five books—just five—that I know I’ll actually get to. Books that interest me, that have been tapping me on the shoulder for a while now. The plan is to spend January, February, and March reading these particular titles. And once I’m done telling you what I picked and why, I want you to choose your five, too. We’re doing this together.

These five books are our January, February, March. They can’t be just any books. Life is short, time is precious. They have to resonate. If your schedule is packed, let that be a recurring theme. Five is an easy, honest number to work with. Then when the weather is cold outside next year at this time, you can do it again with another five books.

Number 1: “Pinball” by Jerzy Kosinski

I picked this book not just because I’m familiar with Kosinski’s work, but because the premise hooked me right away. It’s an alternative rock-and-roll murder mystery, with a main protagonist sculpted after one of the Beatles. To my surprise, when Kosinski was alive and living in New York, he was actually close friends with George Harrison, and this book is dedicated to that friendship. Only here, the story turns on a female stalker with a past who shadows the protagonist everywhere he goes. So I’m definitely looking forward to this one this winter. Other Kosinski books I’ve read include The Painted Bird and The Hermit of 69th Street. Hermit was “meh”—your mileage may vary—but The Painted Bird is concentration-camp fiction at its finest, drawn from Kosinski’s real life as a Polish refugee who, as a young boy, witnessed unimaginable atrocities during World War II.

Number 2: “Welcome to the Monkey House” by Kurt Vonnegut

I used to know Kurt Vonnegut back in the ’90s. We lived near each other, and I’d deliver his prescriptions; he had a house account at the pharmacy where I worked. I was going to school at night then (for writing, obviously), and he’d toss me these little bits of advice, kind of like a humorous mentor who wandered in and out of my day. I remember sitting in the second row at his Timequake reading and premiere in an area of Manhattan known as Turtle Bay around ’98. He signed my copies of Slaughterhouse-Five, Breakfast of Champions, and The Sirens of Titan—three of my all-time favorites—and I tore through his paperback of essays and reviews, Wampeters, Foma, and Granfalloons. But I never really sat down with his science fiction short stories. This collection covers the pieces he wrote in the 1960s. Yes, Vonnegut started out as a speculative fiction writer; a lot of people don’t know that. And it’s one of those books I want to finally get around to reading this winter.

Number 3: “Later” by Stephen King

I usually devour anything and everything Stephen King. The last thing I read by him was Doctor Sleep. I know, that was a long time ago; remember what I said about co-parenting above. But this one—this book—I’ve been sitting on for well over two years now. It’s got one of those gritty Hard Case Crime covers that just punches you in the gut. I grabbed it at Strand Bookstore on the cheap. I heard they were turning it into a miniseries with Lucy Liu, though for all I know it already came out and I’m late to the party. From what I understand, it’s a supernatural coming-of-age thriller with shades of The Shining and The Sixth Sense. It’s got horror, it’s got true crime, and one of the main protagonists is a single mother struggling in New York City. My hometown. So yeah, this one is right up my alley. Now I just need to stop procrastinating and finally give it the time it deserves.

Number 4: “Comedy Writing Secrets” by Mark Shatz (with Mel Helitzer)

Yes, this one’s a “how-to,” an instructional book I picked up recently. Something that might tighten or sharpen a few corners of my writing. Why wouldn’t I want to improve myself? And don’t get me wrong, I know how to write humor somewhat effectively (see my short story “How Jones Goes”). I’ve been paid and published for humor before. I know how to slip it into my speculative fiction when the moment’s right; horror, not so much. But humor is a field that pays well, and I want to write comedy better. Why wouldn’t I want to write anything better? An editor recommended this book—and another, actually—so I went to Barnes & Noble in Union Square and grabbed this one. It’s sold more than 150,000 copies, so on that I’ll give it a try. I want to write more humor, more satire, in the years ahead, and if this can help me get there, then it’s worth spending part of my winter reading it.

Number 5: “Dagger of the Mind” by Bob Shaw

The book above is the version I have: a first-edition ACE paperback from 1979. Vintage, extremely rare. And remember what I said earlier about the 1970s being some of the best years for literature. This copy is a tough find, and I was lucky enough to snag it for only three bucks. It’s in fine condition; no complaints. Bob Shaw was an Irish writer, by way of Belfast, and from the late ’60s through the late ’70s he turned out some of the best short fiction around. He was primarily a speculative fiction guy, a real linguist on the page, and he wrote his fair share of hard SF for publishers like DAW and Berkley. In Dagger of the Mind, the protagonist suffers from Grand Mal seizures, and it forces him to question whether he’s slipping into hallucination, tapping into telepathy, or brushing up against something paranormal leaking in from another world or universe. Now this is the kind of speculative fiction I live for. You know I want to carve out some actual leisure time and sink into this one

Those were my five picks for Winter 2026, and as you can tell, they’re pretty eclectic. I don’t box myself into just science fiction or horror. Now it’s your turn. What were your five choices? Which authors or genres pulled you in? Remember, you can do this. Five is such an easy, honest goal. So stay warm, settle in with a book, or maybe five, and let’s make this a tradition we come back to next winter.

Happy New Year,

Lawrence Dagstine

Other New Entries/Newsletter Updates: You can find the same piece reprinted here (https://lawrencedagstinewrites.substack.com/), and I also invite you to join my Substack. I don’t write exclusively about writing and freelancing. I write about growing up in New York, my life, and life in general. Over time, I’ll be testing new features Substack has implemented, including live video, and in the future the platform will also host paying anthology calls for literary work.


MAGAZINES: “Mobius Blvd No. #27, January 2026” – Hobb’s End Press

We’re heading into a new year. That means one more literary acceptance to celebrate 2026. And what better way than with a new magazine issue from Hobb’s End Press. A magazine available in print and Amazon Kindle formats. This time, with “science fiction.” Science fiction with a murder mystery plot attached to it. A story I wrote back in 2000. Yes, I wrote this next tale 25 years ago. I was young. Even a quarter-century later you can get short stories accepted and published. Never throw them away. It appears in the January 2026 issue of Mobius Blvd, and I decided to revisit it, flesh it out extensively, enhance it, and polish it. What I’m saying is what didn’t work for Boomer editors back at the turn of the century might work for a Gen-Z editor in this day and age. Just apply new technology, give it a fresh coat of paint to justify the plot in the “here and now,” and you’re good to go. My story is called, “Six Seconds to Starfire.” It’s set aboard a Victorian starliner within the confines of the Carina Nebula. Links and pics will be below. Enjoy.

Mobius Blvd. Magazine No. #27 – January 2026 Issue

Published by Hobb’s End Press – Edited by Wayne Kyle Spitzer

Featuring Dagstine story: “Six Seconds to Starfire”

***Sample Mobius Blvd #27 on Amazon Kindle now. Only $3.99***

DESCRIPTION FROM AMAZON (and Author Lineup): There is a byway between reality and dream. A transit we call Möbius Blvd …

Inspired by the enigmatic Möbius strip, a mathematical construct that defies conventional notions of linearity and infinity, Möbius Blvd has no beginning or end but exists in a place where reality and dream have fused … coalesced … merged. With each turn of the page, you’ll encounter a unique blend of horror, fantasy, and science-fiction—fiction that will challenge your perceptions and leave you in awe of the infinite possibilities that exist within the written word.

Indeed, Möbius Blvd is far more than a magazine; it’s an experience. It’s an exploration of the infinite, a passage through dimensions where the only constant is storytelling at its most daring, a kaleidoscope of wonder and terror. Join us on this winding, never-ending journey of speculative fiction that will keep you entranced from the first twist to the last loop. Open your mind to the limitless worlds of Möbius Blvd … and discover that the boundary between fiction and reality is as thin as a strip of paper with a twist.


In this issue:

THE PENCILLER’S LAMENT
George Larson

ONE MORE SMOKE
Alex J. Barrio

ONION WITCH
Rob Herzog

THE WINE-DARK PASSAGE
Wayne Kyle Spitzer

RULE OF FIVE
Amy Kitryn

SANDY BANE
JS Apsley

SHADOW CAST BY EYE AND MAW
Keith Buzzard

SIX SECONDS TO STARFIRE
Lawrence Dagstine

SPEAK, THAT THE FLAME MAY SLEEP
Zary Fekete

THE ENTANGLED
Brian C. Mahon

Hobb’s End Books – Click Link Below, Be Redirected

(All their magazines/available products):

https://darkhorsesmagazine.mystrikingly.com/

Other New Entries: “Magazines”

Farthest Star Publishing: “Acid and Ultra Violence ” – ANTHOLOGIES!

I’m pleased to announce I have a short story of generational horror (along with parenting gone mad!), in the latest anthology from Farthest Star Publishing. This would be my third time published by Farthest Star (they’re the publisher of my novella, The Paraplegic). The name of the book is Acid and Ultra Violence. Fourteen authors are featured. The theme of the book is “violent objects” and “violent people” in science fiction and horror. Those two genres. Hence the title, Ultra Violence. It is edited by D. A. D’Amico. And it is available in paperback and Amazon Kindle formats. I’ll copy and paste all the usual pictures and links down below, any necessary details. The name of my story is, “The One to Keep.” And it’s a new tale.

Acid and Ultra Violence Anthology – Edited by D. A. D’Amico

Published by Farthest Star Publishing

Featuring Dagstine story: “The One to Keep”

***Sample it out now on Amazon Kindle***

DESCRIPTION FROM AMAZON: Welcome to fourteen stories where nothing is what it seems, and every answer unlocks darker questions. Step through shattered futures, cursed realms, and surreal battlegrounds crafted by both seasoned and emerging writers. These tales don’t just shock—they invite you to cry, scream, and bleed with the characters. And to enjoy a good helping of… Acid and Ultra Violence.

These stories don’t comfort. They hurl you into worlds where rage sparks revolutions, grief becomes a weapon, and nothing—whether futuristic, arcane, or infernal—survives untouched. Heroes are forged from trauma, villains born from love, and survival demands a brutal price. Every tale hits hard, burns deep, and leaves its mark—and nothing returns unchanged.

Some highlights…

In a brutal future where body parts are currency, arrogance and desperation clash in a high stakes game of chance. Tech-enhanced Polimi triumphs over the desperate Carmuia, winning a horrific payment of flesh. But Polimi’s victory is cut short… leaving her with only the cruel, ironic sting of absolute loss.

In a world ruled by monsters, a desperate hunter carries a horrific secret bargain. Driven by this desperate promise, she is compelled to lure others into an alien trap. But when her own family becomes part of the creatures’ cruel game, Jill must make an agonizing final choice that will determine the fate of them all.

In a kingdom of chains, a captive witch is forced on a quest for the mythical Pin of Light. Surrounded by deceit and ancient wards, Ja’ala must navigate a spoiled Prince’s arrogance, unforgiving terrain, and dark, evil magic as she prepares to pay the ultimate price of the artifact—a price that may be higher than she could ever imagine.

A scavenging crew risks everything to breach a colossal, ancient starship trapped near a black hole. But the ancient vessel’s opulent halls quickly become a prison of cold terror. Isolated and surrounded by betrayal, the crew begins to turn on itself, unaware of the ship’s deepest secret—a terrifying reality that warps the very nature of time.

Stories:


“Gray Rock Method” by Lauren C. Teffeau
“Crossing the Line” by Andrew Akers
“Mr. Mongo’s Fanciful Elixir” by Glenn Dungan
“The Curator” by Elese Mathis
“The Widow and the Rain” by Paul Martz
“Just 35 Percent” by Adam Stone
“The Pin of Light” by Dean N. D’Amico
“Skin in the Game” by C. J. Erick
“The One to Keep” by Lawrence Dagstine
“Obliterating The Olive” by Shane Porteous
“When the Music Stops” by C.J. Taylor
“Black Segments” by John Leahy
“The Fold” by Jeremy Zentner
“Vector Victoria” by D. A. D’Amico

Edited by: D. A. D’Amico

Other New Entries: “Books & Anthos” and “Digital Credits”

Savage Realms Press: “Necro-Sapiens (Anthologies of Horror Series)”

I’m in yet another horror anthology. They just keep flooding in. It’s available in ebook, paperback, and audiobook formats. The best of all worlds. This time from the fine folks at Savage Realms Press. They are known for their dark fiction anthologies that go all the way up to 500 pages in length. But that’s not all. They produce captivating gamebooks too. How awesome is that! Small press is hot right now, and you should check out Savage Realms’ latest production: Necro-Sapiens. It’s the third book in a series. I’m in it, along with some familiar names in horror: Bram Stoker nominee James Dorr, Troy Anthony Schermer, Matthew Hollis Damon, Angelique Fawns. The list goes on. My story this time around could best be described as one part cosmic horror, the other part dark fantasy. What happens when you take a highway accident, a creepy little girl with a balloon, and throw a distraught clown into the mix? You get my story, “Whatever Your Heart Desires.” I’ll leave all pictures and links down below.

Savage Realms Press presents: NECRO-SAPIENS (Anthologies of Horror Series)

Featuring new Dagstine story: “Whatever Your Heart Desires”

SAVAGE REALMS PRESS MAIN WEBSITE – (click link, be redirected):

https://www.savagerealmspress.com/

**Necro-Sapiens is on Amazon Kindle, in paperback, and audiobook**

I’m thrilled to share that, as of this post, Necro-Sapiens has officially broken into the TOP 100 on Amazon Kindle! This marks the third anthology featuring one of my stories in just the past few weeks to hit the TOP 100 in its category.

DESCRIPTION FROM AMAZON: From Savage Realms Press comes a truly unsettling assortment of tales about the undead guaranteed to haunt your dreams and stalk your waking hours!

  • A detective investigates the mysterious disappearance of a university professor
  • A sheriff and a pie-loving redneck must team up to end a string of gruesome murders
  • A professional thief is hired to recover the stolen urn of a dead rock star
  • Love is in the air with a modern day mummy romance
  • and many more

Necro-Sapiens features 23 delightfully dreadful stories of the macabre from authors Amanda M. Blake, Mark Silcox, K.M. Parker, Marie Lanza, Matthew Hollis Damon, M. Legree, Kevin Beckett, Angelique Fawns, Harding McFadden, Lawrence Dagstine, Arindam Kalita, Gordon Grice, TroyAnthony Schermer, Paul O’Neill, Rich Restucci, R.L. Blackburne, Jordan King-Lacroix, James Dorr, Shane Simmons, Jake McCormac, LJ Jacobs, and John A. DeLaughter.

Other New Entries: “Books & Anthos” and “Digital Credits”

Eldritch Cat Press: “Cemetery Songs Vol. 1” – NEW PRESSES, NEW ANTHOLOGIES!

Busy season for horror and dark fantasy. Pooped. Back again with yet another anthology appearance. This time for a new genre publisher, called: Eldritch Cat Press. The editor there is the talented Alanna Robertson-Webb. And for this press’s debut anthology they decided to go with something themed. Stories centered around three things: cemeteries, songs, and cats. The anthology includes all those things. That’s the recipe here. It got such an amazing turnout, it spawned TWO volumes. I was one of the lucky authors to make it into the first volume. Volume one. My story takes place in ancient times, Greater Assyria. It’s called: “Songs for the Unburied.” I’ll leave pictures and essential info below. Check it out on Amazon, in print or ebook formats.

Cemetery Songs Anthology – Volume #1

Published by Eldritch Cat Press – Edited by Alanna Robertson-Webb

Featuring Dagstine story: “Songs for the Unburied”

***Available on Amazon Kindle or in print paperback formats***

Company Logo Copyright Alanna Robertson-Webb, Eldritch Cat Press

DESCRIPTION FROM AMAZON:Cemetery Songs Volume 1 is the first of two books featuring 20 fictional, short horror stories from a unique blend of authors. While each story is vastly different in tone, style and content they all have three elements in common: a cat, a song and a cemetery. Some stories will send chills down your spine, others will leave you with a quiet, unsettled feeling in the pit of your stomach and a few may even bring a tear to your eye. Come, pull up a seat with us as we dive into this incredible blend of entertaining tales fit for the living…and the dead.

Other New Entries: “Books & Anthos” and “Digital Credits”

Altitude Press: “WHATEVER!” – A Generation X Flash Fiction Anthology

I’m pleased to announce I have a 2000-word piece set during the time of the original Star Wars trilogy in the latest release from Altitude Press: “Whatever – A Generation X Flash Anthology” Most of the stories in the book run the gamut of 1000 to 1500 words in length, with mine probably being the longest of them all. Edited by Nicole McInnes, this would be my second time published by Altitude Press (I was in a themed anthology of theirs a year ago, centered around dogs). There are 22 authors in all, many nationalities, from all over the world. And each of them have experienced Gen-X in some way that is nostalgic (those, at least, born between 1965 to 1980). Whether it’s staying out all night till the break of dawn. Maybe watching MTV. Being alive when Jimmy Carter and Ronald Reagan were president. Or realizing the very real threat of a Third World War. For me, it was going to the cinema at a young age and watching Luke Skywalker fight Darth Vader. Check out my story, “Movie Night.”

Whatever: A Generation X Flash Fiction Anthology

Published by Altitude Press – Edited by Nicole McInnes

Featuring Dagstine story: “Movie Night”

***Available on Amazon Kindle and SOON in print paperback format***

I’m also pleased to announce that, as of the writing of this post, WHATEVER! has broken the TOP 100 for fiction anthologies on Amazon Kindle…

Other New Entries: “Books & Anthos” and “Digital Credits”

West Mesa Press: “Lurking in the Gene Pool” – 2025 ANTHOLOGY

Pleased to announce I have a 4000-word story in this year’s West Mesa Press anthology (in conjunction with Three Cousins Publishing), Lurking in the Gene Pool. This one is just in time for Halloween, and the theme for this year is “supernatural family members” — something I’m good at writing over the years — or anything in relation to such family members. Hence, the title. Lurking in the Gene Pool (genetically). I’m not sure, but there might even be an Audible audiobook and a hardcover coming from Amazon down the road. So it will be available in all presentations, all formats. My story is brand new and a “different” kind of lycanthropy tale. It take place with a backwards family and a visiting grandfather down in Appalachian country. So yes, technically, it’s Appalachian Horror. I’ll leave all pics and ordering info down below. Check out my tale: “Looking for Meteorites.”

Lurking in the Gene Pool Anthology – Edited by Robert Lupton

Published by West Mesa Press (Three Cousins Publishing)

Featuring new Dagstine story: “Looking for Meteorites”

***Available in EBook and Print Paperback formats***

Here are some other West Mesa Press titles (once again, in conjunction with Three Cousins Publishing), I appeared in a few years back. Witch Wizard Warlock features my story “Family Ties.” A witch’s tale. And it’s available at the usual online booksellers: Apple Books, Vivlio, Kobo, Barnes & Nobles, etc.

Other New Entries: “Books & Anthos” and “Digital Credits”

HALLOWEEN BOOKS: “Halloweenthology Bad Pumpkin!” – Wicked Shadow Press

I have a Halloween-themed story about mummies (and housing discrimination related to them) in the latest paperback entry in the Wicked Shadow Press seasonal anthology series, HALLOWEENTHOLOGY 2025 – Bad Pumpkin! Every year Wicked Shadow puts out three beautiful looking tomes in the Halloweenthology franchise, all on the same horrific theme: Halloween. It’s become a tradition. They sell quite well here in the United States and India. This year it’s another three books. I’m in Bad Pumpkin, so remember that. The other books in the series are called “Blood Moon” and “Autumn Falls.” For my story, imagine being a mummy owner, trying to find your own apartment for you and your bandaged-up entourage to live. Imagine getting turned away wherever you tried, housing complex after housing complex, good credit and all. But finally you stumble upon a creepy mortician who rents out one of his apartments. Sometimes, on Halloween, your new landlord may not be who he seems to be. I’ll leave all pics and links below. Be sure to check out my 3800-word tale, “Living Arrangements.”

Halloweenthology 2025 – Bad Pumpkin!

Published by Wicked Shadow Press – Edited by Parth Sarathi Chakraborty

Featuring Dagstine story: “Living Arrangements”

WHERE TO PICK UP “BAD PUMKPIN” – Click Links, Be Redirected:

Paperback purchase links:

Autumn Falls: https://www.lulu.com/shop/parth-sarathi-chakraborty-and-rasiika-sen/halloweenthology-autumn-falls/paperback/product-dyprnrz.html

Bad Pumpkinhttps://www.lulu.com/shop/parth-sarathi-chakraborty-and-rasiika-sen/halloweenthology-bad-pumpkin/paperback/product-jej59qe.html

Blood Moon: https://www.lulu.com/shop/parth-sarathi-chakraborty-and-rasiika-sen/halloweenthology-blood-moon/paperback/product-95jmzzg.html

eBook purchase links

Autumn Falls: https://www.lulu.com/shop/parth-sarathi-chakraborty-and-rasiika-sen/halloweenthology-autumn-falls/ebook/product-kvjn88j.html

Bad Pumpkin: https://www.lulu.com/shop/parth-sarathi-chakraborty-and-rasiika-sen/halloweenthology-bad-pumpkin/ebook/product-m25d498.html

Blood Moon: https://www.lulu.com/shop/parth-sarathi-chakraborty-and-rasiika-sen/halloweenthology-blood-moon/ebook/product-dyprmgy.html

WICKED SHADOW PRESS ON SOCIAL MEDIA:

Like WSP on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/wickedshadowpress

Follow WSP on Instagram: https://instagram.com/wickedshadowpress

Join the Facebook group to get author-related info from Wicked Shadow and other amazing indie horror publishers: 

https://www.facebook.com/groups/7867933553277077/

Other New Entries: “Books & Anthos”

Want more Halloween fun? Listen to my narrated story, The Children of the Barn, over at Creepy Podcast. Link: https://www.creepypod.com/episodes/2025/10/8/31-days-of-horror-2025-day-20-starved-amp-the-children-of-the-barn

The Triumvirate: A Journal of Fantasy, Science Fiction, and Horror Vol. 6…

Pleased to announce I have a brand new speculative fiction story about afterlife science and “where do we go from here” when, as senior citizens, our time is up. And you can find this exclusive tale in David Oliver Kling’s The Triumvirate Volume #6. This would be my third outing with Mr. Kling’s fiction digest, which he started in the name of fandom as a teenager back in the 1980s. I’m also appearing beside Joshua Vise, who I’ve shared a handful of TOCs with these past two years. It’s available in a paperback format, just like the pulp journals of yesteryear. Or for convenience, you can get it on Kindle for the low price of $2.99. The name of my story is: “Where All Souls Eventually Go.”

The Triumvirate: A Journal of Fantasy, Science Fiction, and Horror Vol. 6

Edited and compiled by David Oliver Kling

Featuring Dagstine story: “Where All Souls Eventually Go”

Sample or buy on Amazon below (Kindle or print):

Details about The Triumvirate:

Four stories. Three genres. One unforgettable journey into the strange, the haunted, and the transcendent.
In this sixth volume of The Triumvirate, the boundaries of imagination stretch and shatter. Step into a near-future where souls are collected like family heirlooms. Descend into a haunted mansion that opens its doors straight into Hell. Witness the slow unraveling of civilization through the eyes of a historian in a broken world. And follow a grieving girl’s perilous quest to a cursed temple where legends are born and blood remembers.

Featuring:

  • Where All Souls Eventually Go by Lawrence Dagstine. A daughter keeps vigil in a hospice that preserves the essence of the dying, contemplating what we carry beyond the veil.
  • House Sitting in the Satan House by Mark Mackey. When two sisters take a last-minute job in the wrong house, a night of glamor turns into a descent through damnation.
  • The End of a Lineage by Joshua Vise. A chilling chronicle of humanity’s fall, told from the ruins of reason, where an everyday miracle becomes the seed of apocalypse.
  • The Dagger and The Wish by David Oliver Kling. A sorrowful girl. A sacred blade. A temple steeped in ancient power. Witness the origin of the legendary warrior known only as the Blue Devil.

The Triumvirate: Volume 6 is your portal to the darkly beautiful, the eerily prophetic, and the mythically charged. Open its pages, if you dare.

Other New Entries: “Magazines”

Dark Horses: The Magazine of Weird Fiction No. 43, August 2025 – Hobb’s End Press!

I’m pleased to say I’m back in Dark Horses Magazine, Wayne Spitzer’s long running Amazon Kindle and print periodical of genre fiction. This would be my second outing in Dark Horses, this time No. #43, the August 2025 Issue. I’m also back with a popular Japanese-inspired horror story, The Bite of the Cherry Blossom. And leading the Table of Contents this time around to boot. It’s a beautiful cover. The author line-up can be found below. Hobb’s End Press puts together a few of these monthly speculative fiction publications, including Black Sheep and Mobius Blvd. So if you missed Bite of the Cherry Blossom before, now’s your last chance to sink your teeth into this eerie tale about Japan’s suicide forest.

Dark Horses Magazine #43, August 2025 Issue

Published by Hobb’s End Press – Edited by Wayne Spitzer

Featuring Dagstine story: “The Bite of the Cherry Blossom”

Get it on Amazon Kindle or in print format.

Go directly to the Dark Horses website below, be redirected.

LINK: https://darkhorsesmagazine.mystrikingly.com/

Dark Horses Magazine August 2025 author lineup:

THE BITE OF THE CHERRY BLOSSOM
Lawrence Dagstine

BLACK MAGICK 101
Gray McClary

GLADIATORS IN THE SEPULCHRE OF ABOMINATIONS
Alexander Zelenyj

LEX TALIONIS (THE RULE OF CORD)
R.C. Bramhall

SADIE
Wayne Kyle Spitzer

NORMAN NODDING
Stephen McQuiggan

THE CROOKED ROAD
Stephen Shewmake

THE GOOD SHIT
Brian J. Smith

BEYOND UNKNOWN
Barry Vitcov

WISP
M.P. Strayer

Other New Entries: “Magazines”

MILITARY ANTHOLOGIES: “Dead Man’s Land” – SHELL SHOCK!

I have a new World War 2 story in the latest Wicked Shadow Press anthology, called: Dead Man’s Land – Shell Shock! There are actually two books in this series. One is called Trench Rot, and I’m in Shell Shock. So remember that, Shell Shock (cover below). And while each of the stories in this book focus on military horror, my tale could best be described as “speculative.” The name of my story is The Day of the Dragon. It’s about a unique soldier who finds himself in a fictitious village in Southern Italy. Why are the Nazis after this soldier? Are the rumors true? Is he really unnatural, like a dragon? Well, there’s a whole Panzer division on its way to take him out along with members of La Resistenza (the Italian Resistance/Italian Underground). How will this battle pan out? Find out in The Day of the Dragon.

Dead Man’s Land: Shell Shock – Military/War Anthology

Published by Wicked Shadow Press – Edited by Parth Sarathi Chakraborty

Featuring Dagstine story: “The Day of the Dragon”

Available in India and the United States

Where to purchase the print or ebook versions (click links, be redirected):

Paperbackhttps://www.lulu.com/shop/parth-sarathi-chakraborty/dead-mans-land-shell-shock/paperback/product-rm6yw86.html

ePubhttps://www.lulu.com/shop/parth-sarathi-chakraborty/dead-mans-land-shell-shock/ebook/product-zmygzr8.html

Wicked Shadow Press on Socials:

Like WSP on Facebookhttps://www.facebook.com/wickedshadowpress

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Other New Entries: “Books & Anthos”

Stygian Lepus, Edition #26. Summer 2025 – NEW MAGAZINES!

For my next new short story, I’m appearing once again in Stygian Lepus. What started out as a subscriber-based webzine two-three years ago is now a beautifully illustrated (big-and-tall!) print magazine with a Kindle version next to it. But I recommend the print. This would be the second time I’ve appeared in Stygian Lepus. I come this time with a horror tale of unspeakable cannibalism and ritual. The hungry sort of rituals that only happens in small towns with the creepiest characters, and only on one day of the week when the sun goes down. Tuesdays. But what kind of feeding takes place in the town of Canaan Hollow? Why Tuesdays, and what does it mean for the residents there? Find out in my new, extreme horror story: “The Hungriest Tuesday.” Now. In Stygian Lepus #26. All links below.

Stygian Lepus Magazine, Edition #26 – Summer 2025

Available in Big-and-Tall Print, Kindle (ebook), or in a Webzine format.

Featuring new Dagstine story: “The Hungriest Tuesday”

Stygian Lepus Main Homepage/Back Issues (click link, be redirected):

https://www.stygianlepus.com

THE NAMES OF THE AUTHORS AND THEIR WORKS:

In Sections by Dee Allen

Sin Eater – Part Three by Paul W. La Bella

Get In! by Steve Calvert

Memories Saved by Allen Cash

The Hungriest Tuesday by Lawrence Dagstine

Blood Ties by Malina Douglas

Howl by Albert N. Katz

How Beautiful Things Disappear – Part One by Euan Lim

The Animals of Inkwhich Inn by Steven McClain

Department of Murderous Vixens by Don Money

Dear Raven, by Nick Romeo

Not All Who Wander by Damir Salkovic

Bullshit, Inc by Jeremy Stelzner

One More Drink by Meta Paige Taylor

The Hinge That Shouldn’t Have Moved by Fendy S. Tulodo

ORDER ON AMAZON/SAMPLE (click preview, be redirected):

Also, previous issues/covers featuring Lawrence Dagstine. Worth checking out.

Note: the print version drops on June 29th 2025 on Amazon.

Other New Entries: “Magazines”

HORROR ANTHOLOGIES: “Circus of the Dead” – Edited by Chad Anctil

For my next horror anthology it’s another new one, this time guest edited by Chad Anctil (who I’ve shared TOCs with in the past, such as the popular animal fiction book To The Dogs). Wicked Shadow Press is the indie publisher putting it out. And it’s themed around “circuses” and “carnivals.” Circus of the Dead! The book features a plethora of great names: from Bram Stoker nominee James Dorr to Jacek Wilkos, Andrew Kurtz, Joshua Vise, Lawrence Miles, Lynn White. If you’re in the short story field, you’ll obviously recognize some of these names from other literary productions. My story is a western featuring undead horses, and every tale ties in with the Big Top in some shape or form. Read Circus of the Dead now, and read my brand new story: “Dead Pegasuses.” Pics and ordering links will be down below.

Circus of the Dead – published by Wicked Shadow Press

Guest edited by fiction writer Chad Anctil

Featuring new Dagstine story: “Dead Pegasuses”

Where to order the book (click links, be redirected):

Paperback Version: https://www.lulu.com/shop/chad-anctil/circus-of-the-dead/paperback/product-q6kmed5.html

ePub Version: https://www.lulu.com/shop/chad-anctil/circus-of-the-dead/ebook/product-rmz75jn.html

Follow Wicked Shadow on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/wickedshadowpress

Follow Wicked Shadow on Instagram: https://instagram.com/wickedshadowpress

Other New Entries: “Books & Anthos”

Critical Blast Publishing: “Gods and Services New Location” – ANTHOLOGIES!

I have a novelette out in the recently released anthology from Critical Blast Publishing, Gods and Services New Location. I’m appearing beside 9 or 10 other authors, with stories on the subject of objects related to mythological gods or deities that you might acquire from a curiosity shop. They could be a good deity, or a bad deity. The presence of these gods could be related to statues, chandeliers, ancient artifacts, books. Hence the title and theme. Imagine walking into an antique dealer and finding an object for your home that once belonged to a god. The book is edited by R.J. Carter, and Critical Blast Publishing does a lot of these themed anthologies. They also do a lot of comics, graphic novels, and some illustrated genre fare and their products can be found at vendor tables at various conventions around the country. The name of my story is The Barn Cupid, and it’s about a possessed Cupid statue. It’s a horror-love story, obviously. It is available in paperback, on Amazon or Barnes & Nobles. I will provide all links and pics below.

GODS AND SERVICES NEW LOCATION

Published by Critical Blast Publishing – Edited by R.J. Carter

Featuring Dagstine story: “The Barn Cupid”

On Amazon (sample it, buy in print paperback):

Or buy it at Barnes & Nobles (click link, be redirected):

https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/gods-services-r-j-carter/1147212287

ISBN-13: 9781967199914

Critical Blast Publishing Homepage:

https://www.criticalblast.com/content/publishing

Other New Entries: “Books & Anthos”

NEW ANTHOLOGIES: “Who Let the Gods Out?!” – Wicked Shadow Press

My next story is yet another new one, and this time to a themed Wicked Shadow Press anthology again. The name of the anthology, part of a two-book series, is “Who Let the Gods Out?!” – Divine Wrath. I’m in Divine Wrath (that volume), keep that in mind. I’m sure there was no pun intended when naming these (**wink wink**), and while the books are primarily horror-focused, my story falls more under the umbrella of dark science fiction. The main protagonist is a Russian fisherman who has always had his eyes set on the stars, as far back as the fall of the Soviet Union and KGB. He’s in search of an alien probe with godly technology inside of it, but so is a very rich entrepreneur. This tycoon wants the quantum computing tech the aliens are traveling with, but at what price? What will he become once he gets his hands on it? Find out in: “Transcendence.”

WHO LET THE GODS OUT?! Anthology – Divine Wrath

Published by Wicked Shadow Press/Edited by Parth Sarathi Chakraborty

Featuring new Dagstine story: “Transcendence”

ORDERING INFO (click links below, be redirected):

Who Let the Gods Out paperback: https://www.lulu.com/shop/rasiika-sen-and-parth-sarathi-chakraborty/who-let-the-gods-out-divine-wrath/paperback/product-m2mzd9e.html

Who Let the Gods Out ePub: https://www.lulu.com/shop/rasiika-sen-and-parth-sarathi-chakraborty/who-let-the-gods-out-divine-wrath/ebook/product-w4k74zj.html

Wicked Shadow Press on Social Media:

On Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/wickedshadowpress

On Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/wickedshadowpress

Other New Entries: “Books & Anthos”

CHRISTMAS HORROR: “Merry Creepsmas” – Wicked Shadow Press

My next story is also a newbie. And while the anthology it is being featured in is holiday oriented (one of Christmas-themed horror)… My short story could best be described as dark, dystopic science fiction. It is a tale of warning. With DeepSeek and humanoid robots a reality, the future if we are not careful. A tale of man versus machine. A tale of one prisoner explaining Christmas and yuletide blessings to his captor. A tale of human versus AI. Or, just perhaps, if we are not careful, what AGI might become. There are a lot of great holiday stories in this book. The layout and presentation from Wicked Shadow Press is nothing short of excellent, and these books are hot in India. Prepare yourself for my brand new story of what generative AI might evolve into in a few decades: “For my Enemy on Christmas.” Ordering details at the bottom.

Merry Creepsmas – The Green Book (Xmas themed Horror)

Published by Wicked Shadow Press – Edited by Parth Sarathi Chakraborty

Featuring new Dagstine story: “For my Enemy on Christmas”

ORDER BOTH VOLUMES (I’m in the Green Book/Edition):

THE GREEN BOOK (availability in USA – click below):

Paperback: https://www.lulu.com/shop/parth-sarathi-chakraborty/merry-creepsmas-the-green-book/paperback/product-v8jvm8v.html

Ebook: https://www.lulu.com/shop/parth-sarathi-chakraborty/merry-creepsmas-the-green-book/ebook/product-7ker84d.html

THE RED BOOK (availability in USA – click below):

Paperback: https://www.lulu.com/shop/parth-sarathi-chakraborty/merry-creepsmas-the-red-book/paperback/product-gj26dkw.html

Ebook: https://www.lulu.com/shop/parth-sarathi-chakraborty/merry-creepsmas-the-red-book/ebook/product-p67r5zn.html

Wicked Shadow Press on social media:

Follow WSP on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/wickedshadowpress

Follow WSP on Instagram: https://instagram.com/wickedshadowpress

Be a part of the Facebook group to get regular author-related info and submission calls from Wicked Shadow: https://www.facebook.com/groups/7867933553277077/?ref=share

Other New Entries: “Books & Anthos”

Other New Stuff in Addition: “Lawrence Dagstine Newsletter”

https://lawrencedagstinewrites.substack.com/

SCIENCE FICTION BOOKS: “Quaternary Realms, Short Stories of SF & Fantasy Vol. 2” – Edited by C.M. Bratton

I’m pleased to announce that I’m back in one of the San Antonio SF & Fantasy Authors’ association’s print anthologies. Last time it was a book on science fiction and fantasy poetry. This time, it’s an anthology of brand new and exclusive short stories, and edited by C.M. Bratton again. The name of the book (now up on Amazon, and I will provide links and a TOC below): Quaternary Realms Volume #2. My piece could best be described as a tale of somewhat forbidden dinosaur science on a distant Jurassic world. It delves into the realm of “Cretaceous-style hunting and cloning” for sport, and the responsibilities of a veterinarian who has to coexist with giant reptiles. Read my new science fiction tale now: “Dinotopia.”

QUATERNARY REALMS ANTHOLOGY: Volume 2 – Edited by C.M. Bratton

Published/put out by The San Antonio SF & Fantasy Author’s Association

Featuring Lawrence Dagstine story: “Dinotopia”

Available on Amazon in paperback. Also available on the convention circuit.

Click and sample below:

AUTHOR LINE-UP:

Science Fiction & Fantasy story titles:

Other New Entries: “Books & Anthos”

Other New Stuff in Addition: “Lawrence Dagstine Newsletter”

https://lawrencedagstinewrites.substack.com/

FREE STORIES: “Visitation Rights” by Lawrence Dagstine

Welcome to Free Story Day! I have a chapbook tale to share called “Visitation Rights.” It’s a paranormal court story about a heated legal battle for a child transitioning into a ghost. The child’s father argues that his spirit should stay with him during this eerie transition, rather than remain in the realm of science. However, the judge believes he knows what’s best for the child’s welfare in his current state. There are science fiction elements to this story, as I predicted such court battles would take place long after Barack Obama left office. Originally published in 2009 by Damnation Books, it was part of their debut lineup of ebooks, when ebooks and the digital revolution were fairly new—Amazon Kindle, for example, was probably in its Second Generation. Lisa Jackson was my editor, and it sold extremely well for five years. Cinsearae Santiago created the cover. The story emerged during a time when I was writing a lot of sociological horror involving family dynamics, father-mother-child relationships, and how children can be more terrifying than adults in certain situations. Not too many authors were doing this kind of fiction back then. At least in a way that makes the idea of life after death seem totally plausible, kind of like it could just blend right in with the living and everything we deem real. At the time, I made a professional impression with it.

Anyway, without further ado…Visitation Rights (2009) by Lawrence Dagstine.

Jack Golden was magnificent, his wife Margery thought as she looked on from the front row. He was controlled, sincere, and candid, just as their lawyer had urged him to be. He was a tall, handsome figure of fifty-seven, barely even gray at the sides. He had dark brown hair and lively, intelligent green eyes like Margery, who had her own spark of confidence. She was petite, auburn-haired, and just as youthful-looking in her middle age.

Their naturally relaxed manners of speech were usually inclined to set a distance between themselves and those who existed outside the norm of modern society. Some in the courtroom found their cultured East Coast accents disquieting—after all, they were dragging this out in Jenny’s new hometown—especially when it came to these things. Still, wherever the legal battle might end up, Jack always regarded his family first and foremost and was ready to fight.

Margery, however, had felt awful on the stand. It had been a relief to discover that the lawyer had not chosen to make an issue of her visit to her daughter-in-law, Jenny Hathabee. She was as good as a wife could be to her son, who had been fatally wounded in Afghanistan. Of course, Jenny’s opening testimony was a real surprise; it almost felt like a custody battle. Cagey lady, Margery thought, wondering what other surprises the opposition had in store.

She watched now as Jenny’s lawyer slowly rose, like a bear moving in for the kill. Only this bear was rotund, his disposition stiff like the color of his suit, along with a short mustache and bulbous nose. Oh yes, and dark eyes. All lawyers had them. The odd image frightened her, but good ol’ Jack seemed to be reacting well, chin thrust out, hands on his knees.

“Mr. Golden.” The voice of the lawyer boomed in the cavernous courtroom. “What is your occupation?” He did not smile. His pose was unmistakably aggressive.

“I used to work in Washington during the Obama Administration. I was an inspector for a stem cell research facility. Just retired. Now I work part-time in a slightly similar platform, what the scientists-turned-corporatists call a nursery. The rest of my days are spent gardening, cooking, cleaning, hanging out about the house.”

“Are you enjoying your retirement?”

“I told you, I’m not that retired,” Jack said, smiling.

“All right. Since you’re familiar with stem cell research and nurseries, can you tell me why you chose that particular day to visit your daughter-in-law’s AV-36 at the camp?”

“I—I just couldn’t stand it any more. I’d looked at some pictures in an album, some frames on my mantelpiece. I missed him is all.”

“But why that particular day?”

“It was my birthday.”

“How old were you?”

“Fifty-seven.”

“What else did that day mark?”

Jack cleared his throat. “My retirement day, after twenty years.”

“Voluntary retirement?”

“No. They have this new program. Fifties are the new sixties. You hit fifty-five, you can retire.”

“In fact, it was an involuntary retirement, wasn’t it?” the lawyer pointed out.

Margery’s stomach knotted, afraid of where this would lead.

“Well, sort of,” Jack went on.

“And you felt, well, lousy. You needed a bit of comfort, a bit of remembrance. So you ran immediately to see your daughter-in-law’s AV-36?”

“Must we refer to him as AV-36?”

“Please just answer the question, Mr. Golden.”

“Well, yes.” Jack sounded confused. “Is there anything wrong with that?”

“From your point of view? Maybe not. From the point of view of an AV-36? That’s another question.” The lawyer began to pace in front of the chair, then suddenly shot Jack a query. “How did AV-36 react to your confrontation?”

Jack squirmed in his seat. “He seemed brain-dead at first, but otherwise he was glad to see me.”

“How glad?”

“Just glad.” He forced a laugh; it sounded hollow. “I brought him some clothes.”

“Where was he when you arrived?”

“In captivity.”

“And your visit interrupted this captivity?”

“Well, yes.”

“How did he express his happiness?”

“He sort of smiled.”

“Did he rush into your arms?”

“Well, no. He probably didn’t know to do that.”

“Did he say something like, ‘Gosh, I missed you,’ or did he show confusion and surprise?”

“I guess he was confused. No, wait! Maybe he was surprised.”

“Not confused?”

Jack scratched his head. “I can’t be sure.”

“In fact, for an AV-36, he was totally confused. Wasn’t he, Mr. Golden? We have it on good authority from the researchers that were present. AV-36’s transition was disrupted. He really didn’t know what was happening. You saw there was no military presence and you bullied your way in. You did not even use your real name.”

“I wanted to see him,” Jack said.

The lawyer sighed heavily. “Mr. Golden, the tragedy here is that you needed AV-36 for therapeutic reasons, to make you feel better about the things that happened to you on that day, to make you feel better about the things that happened to your son, Eric, in Afghanistan. Only AV-36 didn’t need you. He was doing just fine. He is doing fine.” A brief pause, and then, “Yes, I understand it’s hard losing an only child to war, but you intruded on this woman’s life”—with this, he gestured to Jenny—“the new one she has built and worked so hard at. AV-36 is a happy, adjusted, productive, normal… Well, you worked in stem cell research, Mr. Golden, and even now you’ve found part-time employment in a nursery or camp which fosters the same kind of thing. As much as I hate to say it, he either didn’t need, or want, your visit, did he, Mr. Golden?”

“If they let the transitioning period happen in a normal way—”

“We are dealing here with what is best for an AV-36. That is the only issue in this court, Mr. Golden.”

Jack clenched his hands into fists. “Oh, for God’s sake, stop with the scientific labels! He needed his family around him. Not Jenny shipping him off to be prodded and poked!”

As the cross-examination continued, Margery felt a sinking sensation in her heart. She knew her man. Just beneath the surface, he was at the breaking point. The opposing lawyer suddenly became ingratiating, leading Jack through a series of questions that focused on his early life; the things that he and Eric, of all things, had done together—baseball, football, hunting, fishing—the affection and interests that both father and son shared. How odd, Margery thought. She wondered where the lawyer was going with this and hoped Jack would be able to sustain himself from tears.

“It was a terrible blow to lose your only child, your cherished son?”

“Yes, it was,” Jack admitted sadly. “Many young men and women died for nothing.”

“It depressed you?”

Jack faced the bench. “Very much.”

“Then when you finally realized that stem cell research opened up doors to all sorts of other possibilities, there came the loss of your AV-36?”

“Yes. I never knew we could renew and harvest so much more through monoclonal antibodies and mitotic cells. I never knew we could reach that level.”

“This loss and these possibilities combined, bothered you, did they not?”

“Objection!” yelled the defense. “My client is clearly being psychologically baited now.”

The judge said, “Overruled. I want to hear this. Go on.”

Jack looked to Margery; she covered her eyes and sank in her seat.

“Thank you, Your Honor.” The lawyer cleared his throat. “And your job after twenty years? After witnessing such scientific breakthroughs firsthand? Come, Mr. Golden. No wonder then that you were depressed, that you exhibited odd behavior. Also, you have been known occasionally to lose your temper.”

Jack was rattled now. “Sometimes. But I never—”

“All the pressures of life suddenly coming together can wreak havoc on a man’s psyche.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Jack cried, his voice rising, his body taut. He looked over at Margery again; she gripped herself from standing and interjecting.

“I’m talking about—” The big lawyer paused, his gaze first roaming the room, first to the judge, then to his client, Jenny, then to Margery, and finally back to Jack. “I’m terribly sorry, Mr. Golden. But your suicidal tendencies have to be faced.”

Margery felt an invisible hand grab at her insides and squeeze. She nudged her attorney on the elbow to do something.

The defending lawyer stood up. “Objection, Your Honor! I reject this line of questioning,” she said. “This is outrageous and debased speculation.”

The judge thought for a long hard second, then waved two fingers and said, “Sit down.” He nodded at Jenny’s lawyer. “Go on. This better be relevant.”

Jack rose out of his chair, then fell back, looking bewildered, exhausted, and defeated. “My what?!”

“I’m sorry, Your Honor,” the opposition said, shaking his balding head as if the revelation were equally painful to him. He turned and looked toward Margery. “The state of Mr. Golden’s mental health, as will be shown, was reported by Mrs. Golden herself in a meeting with a nursery counselor only a few months ago.”

“Did this meeting happen because of the AV-36?” the judge asked, still trying to find relevance.

“I can discontinue this line and pick it up again with the counselor. But I assure you it cannot be swept under the rug.”

The judge looked at Jack with an expression that seemed like sympathy. He shook his head, then turned and looked across the courtroom at Margery. His eyes were sad and questioning. His disappointment seemed to drill through her; she wished she could disappear.

Margery turned toward Jenny. “How could you?” she asked in tears. “You were like a daughter to us. We treated you as family. We put a roof over your head while you were married to Eric. Why?” Jenny quickly turned away, keeping silent.

“Um… May I request a short recess, Your Honor?” the defense asked.

The judge nodded, raised his gavel, and brought it down. He looked behind him at the clock. “Go and have some lunch, people. Be back at two.” Those present rose as he left the courtroom.

For a moment, no one moved. Margery rushed forward to her husband. Feelings of sorrow cluttered her mind, along with much to answer for. But she couldn’t find the composure to speak.

“I’m sorry, Jack,” she eventually said, embracing him as he stepped down.

He looked down at her with moist eyes and a frown. “You really think I would have chosen the easy way out? You really think seeing him like that would have affected me where I would have just…just ended it?” There was a moment of silence, then: “I miss him, Margery. I miss him dearly. He’s the only thing our poor Eric left behind. Transitioning doesn’t last a lifetime, you know. All I want is what’s fair before it’s too late. I just want visitation rights.”

*

When the hearing reconvened, Jenny Hathabee rose and approached the stand. It was her second time recalled. Her lawyer followed. Despite the wickedness beneath all that makeup, Jenny looked more radiant than Margery had ever seen her. Her face had filled out and her skin glowed with health. Clear-eyed, neat in her starched blouse and dress ensemble, she looked the picture of confidence and contentment—a far cry from months before, when depression and despair filled her life. It had left her like a hollow shell. Now those around her could acknowledge the fact that the emptiness was gone. She had never appeared as strong as she did at this moment.

Notwithstanding the dispute, Margery felt admiration for her. She had come a long way. From them. Perhaps from Jenny’s point of view she and Jack were pariahs, reminders of sadder days, an unwanted, unnecessary, and negative influence on an AV-36 already lacking in substance.

Jenny’s lawyer gently led her through the questioning. Earlier, he had driven home a few key points to his arguments. It remained to put the frosting on the cake. “And your previous husband, Eric Golden, who is a major factor in all this, was, to say the least, unsatisfactory?” he asked.

The question made Jack shrink back in his seat.

“At first I was reasonably happy,” the woman of twenty-eight said. “At first we even lived in Connecticut with his parents, because we were still on the waiting list for a home on base. Then he went off to Afghanistan, the war became fierce, and the military rarely let him home. After that, there came AV-36.”

“I understand. But when the military did let him home, how did he act?”

“He was distant. He was different.”

“Did you contemplate divorce?”

She lowered her eyes and clasped her hands across the expanse of the bench. “It was on my mind to run away. Yes.”

“Was the experience frightening?”

Very.”

“With respect to your former in-laws, how did they treat you during the marriage to their son?”

“We never had real words. They were never unkind, mind you. They acknowledged me as their daughter.”

“And are they sincere when they say they love AV-36 now?”

“I believe so.”

“Is it true that after your husband’s death, they were supportive?”

“Yes. I suppose so.”

“And when you learned about the importance of transitioning facilities, both morally and ethically, how did your father-in-law react?”

“He did not approve of them.”

“And he made these views known to you, yes?”

“Emphatically. Often angrily.” She stopped for a second. Then, facing Jack, she went on, “Of all people, I thought he would have understood.”

The lawyer paused. Turning, he looked at the Goldens. “Would you tell the court, Ms. Hathabee, in your own words, exactly why you feel that it would be better if Mr. and Mrs. Golden stayed away from your AV-36?”

“Where does he come off saying that it’s her AV-36?” he whispered to Margery.

“Shush!” his wife pinched him.

The judge tilted his head toward Jenny for her reply, then looked over at Margery; she reached out and took Jack’s hand. It was cold and clammy.

“AV-36 is a happy, well-adjusted manifestation. He has a new life awaiting him in every respect. All that stands in the way is the transitioning process and the constant interference of Jack Golden. Thanks to the good people at the camp, he has a new form. One which he loves and, as I’ve said to this court in previous days, another on the way. I know my former in-laws think me cruel and heartless for taking this action, but I have to make decisions that are best for my AV-36. The past for him is a dim memory, as is the case with much of his kind. Why should he be disrupted? Why should he be treated differently than the rest? It is not necessary for him to visit with Margery and Jack. In fact, with all this emotional debris and refusal to let go, it will undoubtedly be bad for him—”

“What makes you say that?” the lawyer interrupted.

“His reaction to Jack’s visit to the camp was upsetting,” Jenny answered. “It upset the others like him. It was an unneeded intrusion on a perfectly good harvest.”

“This must have aggravated you.”

“Yes, well so.”

“And how did this affect you?”

“Badly. I began having migraines and terrible thoughts. I woke up with nightmares almost every night thereafter. I felt haunted by something. Like I was surrounded by negative energy. Like—”

“Like something was molesting your conscience and the environment in which you resided?” the lawyer asked.

“I can only assume it was because of that.”

“Some researchers call that kind of invasive energy an entity.” Then the lawyer said, “Do you believe in the supernatural, Ms. Hathabee?”

Jenny vested a short laugh. “This is the twenty-first century,” she said.

He pushed some more. “Did this whole ordeal leave you with any regrets, any second thoughts about your decision on visitation?”

“None.”

“Regardless of contemplating divorce, did you still love Eric?”

“Yes. I’d be lying if I said otherwise.”

The lawyer nodded and looked up at the judge. “No further questions, Your Honor.”

He doesn’t have to go much further, Margery thought, watching him closely. She looked up at the judge, then back at her husband. Jack’s eyes were burning with intensity. Then the defense attorney moved forward, long-legged, lean and spare, indicating a singleness of purpose that almost made Margery wince with fear for Jenny’s sake.

The female lawyer, brown-haired and bright-eyed, started abruptly. There were no introductions or preliminaries on this day. “If you had not stayed married to Eric, Ms. Hathabee, would you have allowed your former in-laws to have access to AV-36?”

“I object, Your Honor,” the opposition said, rising. “That question is completely hypothetical.”

“I understand.” She reconsidered. “I’ll put it another way then. Ms. Hathabee, you did not have any objection to living with your former in-laws or their support—psychological, financial, whatever—during the brief period following your widowhood. Am I correct?”

“Well, I was no longer an army wife. I had to leave the base. I had no choice.”

“Did you detest it? Were those extra few months so terrible?”

“I did not feel comfortable being dependent on them again. But I did get back on my feet and start a new life for myself.”

“Did you think that they were a bad influence once the AV-36 revealed itself?”

“I wasn’t overjoyed.”

“Why?”

Jenny hesitated, her eyes searching the courtroom. “They couldn’t offer a positive atmosphere for him in this new state.”

“Are you blaming them for the hauntings?”

“The bad energy? In a way, I suppose. You have to understand. Even though Eric and I were distant at times, and the marriage quite rocky, we took vows. If we had divorced, mentally, it still would have been ‘til death do us part. For me, at least. There were always hauntings, but not really in the paranormal sense of the word. Eric’s father just possessed him, instead of the other way around.”

“Possession unwarranted and through influence, an influence you perceived as negative. Is that what you mean?”

“In some ways, yes.”

“In what ways?”

“They were together a lot.”

“Meaning you were left out. That seems very vague, Ms. Hathabee.”

Jenny’s lawyer stood up. “I object, Your Honor. Now she’s badgering my client.”

“I’m almost inclined to agree,” the judge said. “Go on, but gently, please. This is not a murder trial.”

The defense turned back to Jenny. “So you felt that your father-in-law was a bad influence on your AV-36. Perhaps there is vindictiveness lying just beneath the surface, Ms. Hathabee.” She paused. “What do you think?”

“No, I don’t,” Jenny said calmly. “You’re making it sound like I’m deliberately hurting my in-laws. That’s just not the case.”

The attorney was relentless. “So if it had not been for Eric Golden, you might never ever have prohibited your former in-laws from seeing the AV-36?”

“Maybe not.”

“But the spirit didn’t want to be reminded of its own life, what had happened to it, as if it somehow diminished him. It wanted to move on in the most comfortable way possible, surrounded by loved ones. It didn’t want to be brainwashed or tagged. It didn’t want to be harvested or converted. Transformation was the last thing on its mind. Or at least what was left of it. Isn’t that right, Ms. Hathabee?”

“This line of questioning is ridiculous, Your Honor,” the bulbous-nosed lawyer said as he rose to his feet once again.

“I’m simply trying to show, Your Honor, that none of the motivations for barring my clients from visiting their son’s ghost have anything to do with the welfare of the soul per se,” the defense explained, “that an adult woman’s concerns have clearly interfered with what is a perfectly natural, helpful, and enhancing way of moving on to the afterlife uninhibited. It is both moral and ethical, and I see no reason for an objection to that line of questioning.”

“In cases of spectral phenomena, that does not mean the right to automatically grant visitation rights,” the judge interjected. “There are new laws in this day and age. There are reasons for these camps. One minute you’re letting ghosts roam freely around living rooms and graveyards, the next, religious fanatics are hiding in church basements. Or protestors are blocking the White House lawn in droves.”

On the witness stand, Jenny looked wilted, and for a brief moment Margery was afraid her attorney had pushed a little too far. She glanced at Jack, who merely shook his head.

“It’s way out of control, honey,” he whispered. “We should have just said our goodbyes. Besides, there’ll always be the memories.”

“Poor Jenny,” Margery said. “Poor Eric.”

The judge banged the gavel. He was visibly angry and the creases in his forehead stood out. “You may step down, Ms. Hathabee.”

Shaken, Jenny walked back to her seat.

The judge, calming, looked down at all of them. “It would seem that the presentation of both sides of this case is missing a very important element.” In the long pause that followed, Margery felt her stomach drop. “You will see to it that Eric Golden’s ghost is present in this courtroom tomorrow at nine.”

“No,” Jenny cried. “I will not have that!”

“Sir, I hate the idea of putting my beloved, but deceased, child through this,” Margery said.

“He’s only dead seven months,” Jack agreed.

The judge did not respond.

“You know, the man is right,” the Goldens’ attorney said to both sides. “Nobody wanted it this way. Now it’s our only chance.”

“But it’s wrong,” Margery said, her eyes welling up. “He’s barely recognizable.”

“It’s also his soul at stake.”

“Can they refuse to bring him?” Jack asked.

“No. Not while he’s in the custody of that facility. Not while he’s tagged.”

The whole courtroom seemed upset.

Finally Jenny’s lawyer, who was just as concerned, stood up and sucked in a deep breath. “Tomorrow at nine, Your Honor.”

*

The next morning, the courthouse was quiet, all but closed down, mortally wounded by the previous day’s events. It surprised Jack to see it this empty, except for the clerk and the stenographer.

“I won’t say that I’m not scared,” Jack admitted.

“I’m petrified,” Margery swallowed. “You think in this state he’ll know me?”

“You’re his mother. Nobody forgets their mother.” They took their seats, and soon Jenny arrived with her lawyer. The two of them had probably had breakfast together, Jack thought with disgust. Conspiring to manipulate our lives. What did it matter to them?

Despite all his valiant efforts to hold back the gloom, depressing thoughts still consumed him. This thing with AV-36—Eric being called to court—had jolted him. Why was all this happening? Time was when you could go to sleep and get up in the morning and society would be the same as it was back in 2010. A man went to work and provided for his family. A mother watched over the house and helped with her share during a struggling economy. Parents stood lovingly, proudly by their sons and daughters who served in the military. Back then there were no such things as hauntings or the spirits of the dead wandering the earth. At least not outside the movies or comic books. There were no such connections between stem cell research and the paranormal. There was no such thing as life after death in modified forms. Even outside religious circles, the soul was a questionable invention. Had times changed that much? Was this really the future? Where were the honor and dignity in mothers and fathers having to sit in court and secure the right to visit their own offspring and say farewell? Jack was sorry he had turned down the open coffin at the funeral now. Anything was better than having to go through this.

He tried to remember why he had put those shells in the shotgun the day Margery had found him in the study. He could barely remember doing it, just as he had barely remembered the time he placed the razor blade and bottle of scotch along the side of the bathtub. Was he consciously seeking to check out of life, put an end to the frustration and pain and join his son in this wisp-like form? Never! Could he have done something so cowardly and unworthy? Of course not; impossible was a better word. It must have been some of that negative energy like they mentioned in court. Yeah, that was it. Bad energy.

Margery gripped his hand. They heard movement behind them and turned. A smoke-like figure with grayish-blue crystals surrounding it materialized at the door. It slowly moved in, looking like the former embodiment of a man, but now something else. The ethereal image of Eric. Jack felt his heart leap to his throat as their son hovered up the aisle. Everybody hurried to their places, frightened. The ghost stood at the head of the courtroom, busy exploring the high ceilings.

“He didn’t see me,” Margery whispered.

“Of course he can’t,” Jack said with some trepidation. “But he will.”

The clock read fifteen minutes after nine. There was no sign of the judge’s arrival. No one said a word. Margery cleared her throat and the ghost looked toward where they were sitting. Jack lifted his hand and waved. Eric waved back and smiled. Jack noticed a metal bracelet around his wrist. It was made out of a strange metal and read AV-36. Jack whispered to Margery, “Honey, focus!”

“M…Mom?” the ghost said.

“Hello, dear,” Margery cried, her eyes quickly filling with tears.

“See. He recognized you. Nothing to cry about.” Jack did all he could to blink away his own tears. “He just needed a bit of instruction.”

The door leading to the judge’s chambers opened. “All rise,” the clerk said, and they stood up. The judge breezed through the door, lips pursed, unsmiling, and tight-faced like the day before. Jack looked for signs of sympathy; he got no such vibes. Matter of fact, the judge seemed terrified by Eric. Eric, on the other hand, was busily absorbed in assessing this phenomenon of a room and the mysteriously black-robed man who sat high above him in it.

“Will counsel for both parties approach the bench?” the judge said after the ritual of his entrance. Both lawyers rose and stepped forward. Jack strained to hear what they were so fervently whispering about. Eventually, the two lawyers returned to their seats.

“It’s the best deal we could work out,” the Goldens’ attorney said. “The judge will talk with the apparition alone in his chambers. He’ll seek what’s best.”

The judge looked up from his papers. “This trial has been based on one party’s yearning to hold on while the other has wanted to let go,” he began. “It’s been about trying to stay in touch with something far beyond the scope of the living, to either pay tribute or say final goodbyes, and to do what is merely in the best interest of the deceased. Today we will come to a decision.” There was hesitation in his voice. “There will be no court reporter present and no lawyers. Just the ghost and myself.” He paused and looked at Eric. “AV-36,” he said gently.

Everyone in the courtroom looked at the spirit who, surprised to hear his tag called, looked down at his bracelet then up at the bench. When he started hovering, the judge turned to everyone in the courtroom. “Court is adjourned for one hour,” he said, standing up. The ghost gravitated toward the door of his chambers.

Jack felt something give way inside of him. An image, like a developing Polaroid picture, began to appear in his mind. The judge and Eric moving inexorably away from him, levitating, space and time disintegrating. In the image, he could see his own trembling hands, reaching, trying to stop the movement of Eric and the judge. Then they disappeared and he heard the sound of the door closing. The image dissolved.

In the end, all the legal research, all the petitions, all the printed words meant less than this court had realized. The answers could only be found in that most vulnerable place of all, the human heart and soul.

“What is it, Jack?” Margery asked. There was no hiding anything from her.

“It’s no good,” he said. “Either way.”

“You mean the transitioning?”

“Eric will leave this form at some point or another.”

She nodded. He knew what he must do.

An hour had passed. No word from the judge’s chambers.

Jack was watching Jenny. He felt so insignificant in the baroque vastness, not at all the formidable figure he once was. He moved toward her now and struggled to smile.

“I’ll only be a minute, Jenny,” he said, leaning toward her. “I don’t like this business of Eric being in there with him.”

Jenny turned a cheek. “I know that, Jack,” she said gently. “I’m not too crazy about it myself.”

Jack shook his head. “I tell you, Jenny, I never wanted this. I swear it! You were a good wife to my boy, and an even greater daughter.”

Jenny looked up. “Really, Jack?”

“Yes, absolutely. I know you’ll treat my son’s ghost just fine, you know just what’s right for him. He needs to move on.” He inhaled a deep breath. “So what I’m saying is that it’s your say all the way. We’re the outsiders now. We’ve had enough time to say our farewells and make our peace. And if you don’t want us around—it doesn’t matter why—you’ve earned that right as far as we’re concerned. Only what’s best for Eric’s soul counts here, and we’re not going to barge in. Let science handle it. It’s just no good any other way. No good at all.”

“I—I don’t know what to say,” Jenny stammered.

“You don’t have to say anything. We’re just not going to interfere in your life any more. What we want”—he took in some deep breaths—“is not to give Eric’s soul a minute’s worth of pain. Let the professionals go on handling his transition. We’re going to ask our lawyer to withdraw our petition, to stop this whole rotten business.”

Meanwhile, another hour had gone by. Still no word from the judge’s chambers.

“I appreciate that,” Jenny said. “Oh, and don’t think I am oblivious to the pain of it for you and Margery.”

“So that’s it, I guess,” Jack said, bending over and hugging her. Before turning away, he added, “Take care of yourself, you hear?”

When he sat back down, Margery kissed him. “It’s all right, darling,” she said. “Who knows, this might work out in everybody’s favor after all.”

Finally, the chamber doors opened. The voice of the clerk boomed, “Court is now in session!”

“I have reached my decision in this case,” the judge said, avoiding the faces of those in the courtroom. The ghost was not with him. Jack noticed Margery glance at him, but he remained rigid, eyes focused straight ahead. He shrugged his shoulders; he also sensed something wrong.

“As you are all well aware,” the judge began, “the law in this country is not explicit on the point being argued in this courtroom. Yes, morals and ethics must be considered. The issue here is clearly the best interests of the ghost who, when he was a card-carrying member of the living, went under the name Eric Golden.” He paused. “We had a nice lengthy chat in my chambers. Now, it is difficult to assess the state of anyone’s mind and spirit in the brief space of an hour, or two, or even three. Certainly, it is doubly difficult in the case of the dead.” He raised his head and looked toward Jack. He flashed him a broad smile.

Jack recognized those blue eyes and that smirk anywhere.

“But since I am charged with such judgment, I have concluded that this particular ghost is well-adjusted, bright, cheerful, and has much more to look forward to in the next life. He is obviously loved and cherished by his mother and father, as I’m sure is the case with his former wife. The inclination of the case law is to leave well enough alone.”

Jack leaned forward now. He was about to say something when Margery put a finger on his lips and he quieted.

“The question then is, does this well-adjusted, happy ghost need the visits of any family to enhance the quality of his afterlife? It seems to me that in all human endeavors there is not exactly an overabundance of love, genuine and unselfish, honest and caring. When you find it, you should never deprive it of its natural outlet. The dead, in my opinion, need as much of it as they can get. Put aside your grievances. All of you.” He banged the gavel. “This case is closed.”

Jenny’s lawyer now stood up. “That was a very moving verdict, Your Honor. But if I may be so bold, where is the AV-36?”

“Where he belongs,” the judge said. “Free. After our discussion, I let him out the window. It was his choice and his alone. I did not coerce him whatsoever.”

The entire court was shocked; murmurs of disbelief followed.

“Well, that’s that,” Jack said, getting up. “No point in staying.” Margery rose with him as the judge continued to speak. They moved down the aisle, ignoring Jenny’s upturned face. Nor did they pause for one last look at the judge, although Jack could feel his eyes watching them.

“Don’t feel so bad, Jack. Wasn’t really your fault. He did his best,” Margery said as they walked hand in hand out the courtroom.

“Seems he forgot who the victim was.”

“Say what you want. I still think we won the case.”

“Perhaps we did.” He brooded for a moment, pausing in the stairwell. “How can he judge what’s best for a ghost?”

“That’s his job,” Margery responded. “And it was an enlightening speech. I’ll give him that. Turned out he had a lot more feeling than I thought.”

“Hmm, seems he had a little bit more than that.” He paused for a moment. “They took awfully long in those chambers. I want to know why.”

Across the lobby, the couple saw Jenny and her lawyer watching them from above in confusion and slight disgust. The judge, all changed now, headed for the courthouse exit. Jack and Margery took a step forward, hesitant. The judge stopped moving the moment he saw Margery. Through a mist of tears, she moved toward him, equally hesitant. They went to meet one another, middle-aged woman and middle-aged man. When they embraced, Margery was certain it was not only a contact of bodies, but of spirits as well, and what passed between them was beyond words. Then they parted. Jack moved in and the three exchanged brief glances. What they shared needed no articulation. Not any more. The ordeal was finally over.

“Mom, Dad…” the judge said, smirking again.

“We’ve missed you, Eric. We’ve missed you something awful.”

“I’ve missed you, too. And I’m coming home.”

Jack extended a hand and the judge took it. Underneath his cuff there was a bracelet made out of a strange metal. It read AV-36.

THE END

Lawrence Dagstine: “2024 was my most productive year…but wait, there’s MORE…

2024 will arguably go down as my best year in writing and submitting; 2023 wasn’t so bad either (The Nightmare Cycle was published and I got an advance for it). I wrote a record sixty-five short stories between November 2023 and December 2024—all new. During that time, I also received the most book, anthology, and magazine acceptances (some yet to be released) for a single calendar year, surpassing my previous record year of 2008. I received acceptances from a variety of markets—mainly genre, as that is my specialty—in science fiction, fantasy, horror, and even humor. These markets ranged from pro-identifying to token, including small press and micro press. I also appeared in two anthology-magazines that went to number one on Amazon; another Kindle Anthology broke the Top 100 in World Literature, and a handful of my other offerings made it into the Top 100 or Top 500 sales rank-wise. That’s never happened to me before. Additionally, I have a couple of new books out right now (see right-hand column, scroll down).

My rejection ratio was fifteen turn-downs for every acceptance, if you’re curious about the odds. Yes, where there are acceptances, there are rejections. It comes with the territory. But I’m not here to toot my horn. This was a personal goal I wanted to achieve, and I did. I wanted to see if I still possessed that 2000s-era magic.

At fifty years old, you stop measuring press levels—Pro, Semi-Pro, Hobby, Indie—and accept whatever comes your way, especially if it’s available physically (paperback or hardback), and you know how to hustle and sell it. Believe it or not, most of my readers are not from the United States. Many Americans are too dependent on technology, staring at their smartphones all day, or engaging in activities that don’t involve literature. If they do read, it’s usually the “obligatory” twelve books per year—one per month. I’m guilty of this myself. I used to read a hundred books per year, but as you get older, there are only so many hours in a day. Most of my readers hail from places like India, Japan, and, oddly enough, Belgium. Earlier this year, readers from India wrote to tell me how much they liked my horror stories. I appreciate that; I’ve never received such feedback from US readers. Obviously, I was flattered. I joined two writing groups in Manhattan, got the necessary certifications, and became a writing teacher, which is relatively easy in New York State compared to other places.

As we get older, we often become adjunct professors, tutors, instructors, substitute or assistant teachers. We take up residencies, shepherd online MFA programs, hold online and in-person workshops, and add experience to our curriculum vitae. The revenue from these workshops helps fill our fridges. We may teach English as a second language if we move overseas or teach the short story form, novel writing, story analysis, and linguistics. We show younger writers our techniques and formulas, paving the way for them and enlightening them on how we did it. We pass our knowledge to the next generation of aspiring writers. We take on protégés. Other jobs we take on include writing advertising copy, technical writing/business writing, expository essay writing, things like that.

I can’t believe I’ve been doing this for thirty years. Sometimes I wonder if I wasted my life. Should I have pursued another field? Should I have become a full-time artist and taken up comic illustration, which was my passion in the early ‘90s? Despite my love for science fiction, I would have preferred seeing the art through. I lost my love for drawing in late 1994 and turned to writing instead. Applying for art jobs thirty years ago, where prospective employers said comic art and graffiti art weren’t “real art” didn’t help. So I ended up in writing. I appeared in a couple of magazines, made some cash, and bought nice things. Picking up every genre magazine I could get a hold of in Borders and meeting Kurt Vonnegut regularly while working as a delivery boy for a pharmacy further fueled my enthusiasm.

Author Mercedes Lackey once noted that 90% of the writers in the SFWA (Science Fiction Writers Association) have had or currently hold full-time jobs. The rest have spouses who work full-time, serving as the breadwinners, covering the overhead, and providing health insurance for the family. Alternatively, the full-time writer might be retired and living on a pension or 401K. I could join the SFWA tomorrow. But at my age? For what? Bragging rights? I’m ready for the grave. This isn’t to say I won’t produce an anthology in the future. I’m full of ideas, and I won’t accept anything less than outstanding. But hey, I’m old. Many of the books with my stories are published by presses that might not exist in five or ten years. Presses come and go; the same can be said about good books. Publications go on lengthy hiatuses. Economies rise and fall. Inflation affects spending habits. People’s reading preferences change. Advertising techniques and technology evolve. Not only that, over 10,000 books are self-published per day, so there’s no such thing as professional competition anymore. It’s a too-open field. Also, generational shifts happen, and what was popular with one generation might not be with the next. How many people do you know in 2025 who have a profound love for Philip K. Dick, Isaac Asimov, and John Brunner like I do?

I’m very much a socialite. I often go into the city, visit upscale places, penthouses, private parties, and get the VIP treatment. I network and get my books into these places. You have to network in this day and age. Word of mouth is still a very powerful tool, and you want to get non-genre readers interested in reading genre. When I sit down with a glass of wine and talk to affluent or corporate types about horror, they say, “Oh, Stephen King!” And that’s it. They don’t know anybody else. They think Stephen King is the only author there is when it comes to horror. I say, “You haven’t read the work of Paul Tremblay, Stephen Graham Jones, or Josh Malerman?” They give me a daft look. Who? What? They don’t even know that Stephen King has two sons who also write (Owen and Joe). They think Stephen King never had children. But we know. Because writers read each other. We are aware of each other. And it’s kind of depressing in a way. It’s like we’re trapped inside this shrinking genre bubble, and you’re not sure if it’s going to burst or when it’s going to burst. It’s disintegrating, for sure, it’s just a matter of when. You hope it pays your utilities for as long as it can, at least until you take up a teaching position or land an agent. Only 15% of writers ever land an agent and break into the Big Five. And that number shrinks with age. Some are luckier than others; your mileage may vary. What happens for most, whether traditionally published or indie-published, is we end up at genre conventions, gaming cons, comic cons, indie bookstores, or local fairs and fests, and our literature is available at vendor tables.

Nowadays, many people publish each other in a quid pro quo fashion (tit-for-tat), which is fine, but simply reading each other’s work isn’t sustainable in the long term. It seems we’re just passing time until we reach the end. If we’ve chosen writing as our forte, we must have a lot of time to spare. Some of the biggest names, award-nominated genre writers, are suddenly submitting to semi-pro and token markets. This used to be a no-no. Yesterday’s professional paying magazines now depend on Patreons or annual crowdfunding just to survive. And then there’s Artificial Intelligence, which will inevitably replace us in the next 20 years. I’ve seen some of these young tech kids at conferences, and what they can do with Python and Stable Diffusion; they’re smart.

Publishing was a very different animal in the first ten years of the Internet. You could actually make an income from freelancing regularly, and web content was big! Webzines were especially big. They were new, they paid fair money, and there wasn’t much of an editorial filter, but you got your byline and content out to the world. A handful of these sites were built with Dreamweaver, Frontpage (Microsoft), or typical HTML coding. Some were even hosted by GeoCities. Plus, the cost of living was cheaper back then (my rent was only $650 to $750 per month during this era, utilities included). You could stay home, take care of the kids, and have paper checks coming to your mailbox. This was still before the age of PayPal, Venmo, Zelle, and other electronic payment methods. So it was paper checks. If you were a freelancer of genre fiction and creative non-fiction, and you were a quick writer and productive, you got paid $20 to $50 per piece consistently! Sometimes more, sometimes less. One on top of the other. Some of the webzines that appeared in the first ten years of the Internet were Atomjack Magazine, Whispering Spirits, Midnight Times, Dawnsky, The Random Eye, Gotta Write Network Litmag, and hundreds of others! I appeared in many of these places, scouring market sites like Ralan and Spicy Green Iguana on a daily basis. The Boomers never went near these little zines, but I did. And I got my name out there. And I was paid. And I bought clothes. And I bought food. And I paid bills. At one point, I even had a $6000 bank account put aside for my infant son—from writing. There was a time when I had 200 different stories in a folder on a Windows XP laptop, and I would submit to any paying market, even those offering $5.00 compensation. Acceptance here, acceptance there. You do the math. You might find these webzines on the Wayback Machine, but if you’ve heard of the ones I just mentioned, you’re old and gray now, just like me.

To this day, I think the periodical I was paid the most for a single story or article was in either 1999 or 2000, and this was in a queer publication called GENRE Magazine. Or just Genre. And it had nothing to do with genre. They didn’t even publish science fiction. That was just the name. It was primarily a New York-based gay lifestyle magazine with a modest circulation for its time period. It was distributed to LGBTQ-identifying establishments before LGBTQ was even a term. Before ebooks, before Amazon, when physical publications still had modest circulations. When people still relied on the Writer’s Market. I was paid $750 for two, maybe three hours worth of work. The editor said he would take care of the grammatical errors. I kept my mouth shut, let him handle it. Nowadays, twenty-five years later, that same $750 is your paycheck for a horror novel to a rising indie press.

Still, I’m thankful I didn’t become a full-timer in this day and age. I own nice things. Call me materialistic, but I enjoy my little luxuries: designer clothes, nice electronics, video games. I can buy my family birthday and Christmas presents. I can wine and dine on occasion. Some writers who went all-in don’t have that luxury. Imagine not having health insurance, unable to run to an emergency room or urgent care. A vast majority of writers don’t have insurance. Sure, some scored two or three-book deals with the big houses, only to not sell to expectations and never be heard from again. So when people ask me what advice I would give an aspiring writer in 2025, I say, “Don’t quit your day job. Do this strictly for passive income. Do this because you love it. For the sake of art. Do this because you like to tell stories. And read!”

Listen, H.P. Lovecraft died extremely poor. He couldn’t afford treatment for his small intestine cancer, compounded by his fear of doctors. So, he wrote and lived in daily pain—not a pot to piss in. Some of his finest works weren’t noticed until decades later. John Wyndham, a prominent British science fiction writer, was often overlooked in his lifetime. He didn’t receive the recognition he deserved, even as the author of “The Day of the Triffids.” It’s only now, in the 21st century, that his shorter works are being sought out and reprinted. John Brunner, author of mega-hits like “Stand on Zanzibar” and “The Crucible of Time,” feared failure. He wrote under a pen name in his later years and worked as an underpaid proofreader. But regardless of success, they were storytellers. And there’s nothing wrong with being a storyteller. If you get paid for it, that’s like the cherry on top of a hot fudge sundae.

Looking back, I’d say I’m privileged. I’m not a New York Times or USA Today Bestseller by any means. I see myself as a semi-pro of the short form, one of those one-to-three cent jobbers. Apparently, I’m a jobber who makes it into the TOP 100 often; I probably would’ve really crushed it during John W. Campbell’s era. Many writers don’t get to do this for three decades, non-stop. Today, many people self-publish books that are mediocre at best, invest in Amazon Ads, and suddenly they call themselves bestselling authors. They don’t know what it’s like to have spent time in the trenches. Otherwise, a handful of the younger kids coming up don’t know how to read, write, spell their names, or pick up a book after high school. I definitely didn’t think I’d become a teacher. Like I said, I feel privileged. I came to this earth and got to do it. And I’ll try to continue doing it for as long as I have the desire.

This is Lawrence Dagstine, prolific writer for the past thirty years.

Storyteller. Jobber. Future anthologist? I could live with that.

Edited to Add: This essay, which I write from firsthand experience, will be reprinted in a newsletter, currently under development. Stay tuned for news of that.

NEW YEARS ANTHOLOGIES: “The Alien Buddha’s Chaos Countdowns” – Alien Buddha Press

I have a reprint (appeared in DASH Literary Journal about two years ago), that matches the theme of the following anthology. Chaotic or haphazard stories about New Years, and similar celebratory fiction fare to go along with the once-a-year holiday. And what better way to ring in 2025 than with Alien Buddha Press (the publisher), and sharing a table of contents with the likes of NJ Gallegos, Dawn DeBraal, April Ridge, and Bram Stoker-nominee James Dorr. My New Years-themed story has elements of speculative fiction, steampunk, and magic realism in it. Oh, and angel doctors! It’s called Before Measured Time. It takes place right before midnight on December 31st 1899, and the 20th century and universe is at stake! Check out Alien Buddha’s Chaos Countdowns Anthology now on Amazon. Pictures and info down below. Most of all, Happy New Years!

Alien Buddha’s New Years Chaos Countdowns Anthology

Published by Alien Buddha Press

Featuring Lawrence Dagstine reprint: “Before Measured Time”

Available in paperback on Amazon (click preview box below):

Other New Entries: “Books & Anthos”